


The Wørd

by DoctorV



Series: Archive: Doc's Old-Ass Fake News Fic (Daily Show, Colbert Report, etc.) [7]
Category: The Colbert Report, The Daily Show
Genre: Gen, Musical, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-03-31 23:39:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13985766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorV/pseuds/DoctorV
Summary: The Wørd as a musical number.





	The Wørd

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving some old old OLD fanfic of mine. This was originally posted to LiveJournal 03/20/2009, with the author's note:  
> "This was actually an "audition" to write lyrics for a musical-in-the-making called "Pundits." peapods42 gave me the prompt 'The song is called "The Word" sung by Stephen and the cast. Call and response. Choose a topic, but have it be pertinent to either Stephen/"Stephen" personally or some major event/news piece from the past three years. [...] something like "The Internet is for Porn." Serious followed by something hilarious.' The next day, I had this."

STEPHEN: Which brings us to...Tonight's Wørd!  
"Anger Management"!  
Now some elitist, East-coast, liberal, tolerazi stoners intent on  _ lighting their bongs with burning flags! _ might say I have anger management issues! But to them I say...

STEPHEN: I manage my anger here four nights a week,  
When the future of right wing-ed values seems bleak.

CAST:  _ Everyone's _ future seems bleak with conservatives in charge.

STEPHEN: I wield my great anger, my rage do I vent,  
To shout down the voices of lib'ral dissent!

CAST: And rationality and logic and reason at large.

STEPHEN: I protect against their commie gay-genda,  
While my emotional health is put through the blenda.

SOMEONE: Does that rhyme even count—  
STEPHEN: SHUT UP! ...Moving on.

STEPHEN: Count on me to deliver the truthiness,  
With great volume and American ballsiness!

CAST: Next on the agenda: Redefine the English language.

STEPHEN: I don't fear my health as I lead my Nation!  
Show me the proof of my deterioration!

CAST: Maxed out blood pressure's probably a reasonable gauge.

STEPHEN: 'Sides, soft-spoken reasoning don't pay the rent.  
And the low ratings would anger the management.

 

STEPHEN: And that's the Wørd. We'll be right back.


End file.
